Beware the Rabbit Hole!

In the last few posts I’ve talked (many books talk) quite blithely about starting to address our thoughts and change them, as if it’s changing bed linen. Tra la la I’ll just pop this old thing off and swoop this fresh new one on. There. Good as new.

It’s not like that.

Sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes standing apart from your thoughts can be uncomfortable at best, downright painful at worst.

Uncomfortable in that, you may have the belief that showing off is rude. So thoughts like: I deserve the best, I have plenty of money, my house is beautiful, I’m so lucky to have a gorgeous family, I love my body… can feel right outside of your comfort zone. Or just wrong. That’s normal.

Or perhaps it’s painful…

Take for example a glitch thought of I hate my job.

That could raise further thoughts of… I’m not good enough at it, I struggle to make friends with colleagues, I should be better at this, I can’t give up, I’m trapped, people don’t respect me, one day they’ll find out I’m a fraud… and this waterfall thinking can make someone back so quickly away from looking at what’s going on upstairs, they may never try again.

Another hazard is that when you start to get into the process and making progress, you see how everything you think really does create your life, and so, when things go wrong… there’s a temptation to turn the spotlight on yourself and head for Blame City. Don’t go there, it’s a very depressing place… cold and no free parking.

I just want to come right out and say early on… it’s O.K. If this does happen, remember to keep coming back to this post. This is not a process to do in opposition to yourself. You must definitely become a team with your mind; become your own cheerleader. I know it’s not easy at first and maybe familiar, painful thoughts can feel more comfortable. Be gentle with yourself. Remember that.

This process, it’s a bit like re-programming a computer. Perhaps you were programmed in the 90’s, 70’s, 20s. How refreshing to be able to download the outdated stuff and upload some new technical wizardry!

If you do go off into a rally of neggy thinks, cast a mental line and pull them back in. They’re old habits and programming. Focus on one thought at a time and you’ll see results.

I want to tell you why sticking with it is worth it. Firstly, those thoughts are holding you back big time. From everything you are capable of being. From being the person you really are.

But more than that, you know that quote:

“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, it’s about learning to dance in the rain”…

Learning to dance in the rain mean getting comfortable with being wet! Stick with the thing you’d usually run from.

Crafting Calm isn’t just about feeling nice: sunshine and rainbows. It’s also about gathering resilience so that when the sh!t does hit the fan, you can be mentally healthy. Trust me. It’s worth putting in the work.

 

 

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